What To Do With A Christmas Flu…
…or Christmas cold, or whatever it is that has refused to leave even though the presents have been opened, the lights taken down and the New Year rung in. This cold just doesn’t want to let go of the holidays. How does one combat a Christmas cold/flu? This has been my strategy:
-Spray on enough of the new perfume you got for Christmas that you can smell it through the congestion, even if it chokes out the rest of your family, including the dogs.
-Put on the new jewelry you received (mine just happened to co-ordinate with my Kleenex box) and lie in bed and strive to feel amazing as you burn off the holiday calories via a strenuous regimen of sneezing and coughing.
-Make turkey and kale soup and eat it from your new robin’s egg blue Fishs Eddy bowls that you bought for your kitchen from your new favorite store in Nashville, White’s Mercantile, while you were supposed to be Christmas shopping for others.
-Don’t cancel your last writing session of the year and watch as your co-writer (one you’ve never written with before) shifts uncomfortably in their seat as they watch you sniffle and sneeze all over their guitar because you’ve forgotten to bring yours to the session.
-Wear enough bright red lipstick and take enough Sudafed to make it through a lovely New Year’s Eve dinner out with your BFF and her new man to feel somewhat normal, even though you may end up looking and feeling more like a woman of questionable repute with a serious case of the amphetamine shakes.
-The moment you feel a bit better, are non-contagious and no longer feel like a walking case study for the CDC, have a New Year’s Day football viewing and dinner for 12 at your house, because that requires no energy.
These are my suggestions to you. Feel free to take any or all of this advice.
The perfect addition to any woman’s perfume wardrobe.
No matter how red your nose is, emeralds will make you shine like a diamond.